//mood//somber

//think+pray
please pray for my colleagues at big thunder mountain, as well as the victims, and their families.

//mood//slightly.perturbed
//song//again.i.go.unnoticed : dash

//only[three]kinds
[~]snow
[~]corn
[~]frosted

those are the only kinds of flakes that like. all other flakes need not apply.

ugh...i cannot, cannot stand it when people flake on me...especially, especially when they don't have the common courtesy to at least call. sweet be-jeeb-us...it just irks me intensely.

sometimes i wonder if there's a big sign on my head that reads please, i'm begging you, please flake out on me.

last night was just a little too much like deja vu for my liking.

oh well...

no need to dwell on it any longer than necessary...i'm sure that i'll get a decent explanation eventually...maybe she got stuck in auditions...i'll find out on monday, or tomorrow...whatever.

people usually don't flake out on me all that often...it just sucks a whole lot of ass when it does happen.

i guess this kind of consequence is part of the risk entailed in meeting as many people as i've been meeting in the past week...i've met a lot of people, and the year has just begun...

i'll have other opportunities to hang out with people.

the thing that pisses me off most is the fact that i feel like the night was wasted...but, whatever, it's only one night. i'll manage, i'll live, i'll reschedule.

//my.actions+ambiguity
if i were to be a superhero...i think i'd end up being ambiguous man...and i'd have a sidekick known as flamboyant boy. i don't take being heterosexual seriously really...if you're on friendster, just take a look at the testimonials that i give my guy-friends...i don't know, my sexual preferences are just there, and i think it's fun to joke about it. i'm really comfortable being ambiguously straight. you could say that i'm a closet-hetero...

despite the video that nicole has of bo and myself at powerhouse...

i wouldn't mind being ambiguous man...i'd have that cape...a different cape to match all my different outfits...my archenemy would be ryan seacrest...i'd watch football on monday nights, and queer eye on thursday nights...my superhero abilities would include the random dance break.

the more comfortable that i've gotten with it, the more fun/funny i think it is that some would consider me iffy...or misconstrue my sexuality.

//hash.browns.that.taste.like.eggs
okay...i just had breakfast @ school from the titan grill...it was a last resort, but i was hella hungry. the hash browns were green and tasted like eggs, and the eggs tasted like something else...the only good thing that came from my breakfast were the two slices of bacon that tasted like bacon and were the color of bacon. otherwise, it was utter crap. but, i'm not hungry anymore, right? i hope so.

so quiet, another wasted night.

//mood//swell
//song//sunday.drive : the.early.november

//unique.day
okay...yesterday was quite out of the ordinary.

it starts of with me waking up from a dream...one of those random ass dreams that i have about people...a person...an ex-person...annie. it was a good dream, as in the fact that we were happy in that dream, we were talking, we were a couple again...it was incredibly random.

as school rolls around, i continue to meet new people...girls, specifically.

make-up was boring as all hell, but i talked to michelle the whole time, and we're gonna hang-out tonight...and that's cool.

i called up stacey + brit, who i haven't seen nor talked to in ages...and i was very pleased to hear that they were doing well...i'm happy for stacey because she's got tim...who i've heard is really really cool...and seems really really cool.

at night, i hang out with chris...we go to starbucks on la palma...because it's more social than the one on weir canyon...and we meet this one pyro chick who was burning straws and her two guy friends.

after that, we head back to his crib...and then i start using aim...and i see that annie is on-line. i was kinda surprised and intrigued, so i dropped her a line...and we actually had a pleasant conversation on-line. it was cool...and unexpected on both sides...but, yeah.

i also talked to nicole...and we're gonna chill @ the block this afternoon.

i also briefly talked to kristen on-line...i've been thinking about her for the past couple weeks...i've missed her...i haven't seen her for what seems like forever ago...i hope i get to see her soon.

//sbtb
oh my poop! when i went to target last night, i saw the most awesome thing: SAVED BY THE BELL, SEASONS 1&2 ARE ON F_CKING DVD!!!

i crapped myself when i saw that...it was so cool...i want, i want badly!

//this.morning
i finished up another song...and i posted the lyrics to it on poetic impulse. if anyone has ever made a really good friend and had to say goodbye way too soon, you'll feel me on this song. i luv you julie...you're my favorite out-of-state indy-girl!

[~]julie's song (summer collage)

let's drop a note to winter break
and tell it to hurry up

//forecast//today's forecast is total crap

//the.eternal.question
with all the time that michelle and i spend paying attention in make-up class...we came up with a very important question:

given the choice, would you have a unibrow or a mullet?

//talking
we started talking again...and it was nice. i'm happy.

time to throw back some cold ones...now answer my question.

my answer: i'd rock a mullet. bitch.

//mood//tres.magnifique
//song//sic transit gloria...glory fades : brand new

//the[schedule]
it has been a week into school...so, i thought i'd let you in on what my academics are like.

biology/101:elements-of[biology] mwf@900-950
it doesn't seem so bad...i did well in physiology, so i think biology should be somewhat easy. on the third day of class, prof. hanlon led the class to believe that she had a cup full of urine that she was running taste tests on...so...maybe this one won't be so bad.

theatre/263a:acting(one)-majors mwf@1000-1140
karen kalensky wasn't my first choice as an instructor for this class...but you know what? she's alright...i heard that my first choice, evelyn assigned a fifteen page assignment on the first day of class...so...karen ain't so bad...and the class is a lot of self-discovery. the first semester is based on dramatic works...so, next semester is based on comedy...and whoo-who for all of that.

political.science/100:american[government] mwf@1200-1250
the friday meetings are only internet discussions...so, that's already a plus. professor groper just seems very cut-and-dry...but, it's less than an hour every other day...so...i think that i can deal with that.

theatre/285:theatrical[makeup] mw@1300-1530
mm...can't really say much about this class except that i think that it's gonna be the one class to kick my ass...and i kinda need this class for my major. even if the professor can become a little boring...i can deal with it because i'm in the class with michelle g...and i can crack jokes with her, and it totally makes the class tolerable when you have someone there that understands your humor and sheer boredom.

theatre/478b:production+performance tba
the easiest way to obtain two units of 'a' credit.

//[daze]off
i've got a few days off coming...i need to do something about my free time...

//mood//fine
//song//head on collision (acoustic version) : new found glory

//getting.all[emo]
holy crap...i got home last night and hammered out music on the piano and worked on some songs...i started working on your own eulogy...then i played coldplay's the scientist...then i started another song...

the concept of the new song that i'm working on is that it's a letter to someone who just moved away...to put it bluntly, a letter to julie. jeez...the more i think about it, the more i miss her. i didn't realize how much that i missed her until i called her last week. then i started writing the song last night, and i missed her more...

i don't know...writing the song made me realize that she was probably the glue holding the friendship between jessica and me together...

as i sit and wonder what the hell went wrong with my friendship with jessica and try to figure out the reasons...i also end up caring less...because at the same time i realize that i've got other friends that care about me.

one of the last people that i thought that i'd be keeping in touch with is julie...but, things have worked out differently...i miss her a lot.

indy really isn't the same without her.

this will be a summer collage
of words meant to massage
an aching heart filled with photographs
that misses all the laughs.

the weird thing is that i started the song with the full intention of writing a happy song...and it ends up with me kinda tearing up...

it just kinda makes me realize that summer is over...when julie left, that's when the end of summer began.

//bored
having a bunch of days off and nothing else to do really kinda takes its toll on you...i'm actually kinda looking forward to school tomorrow...even if i've got that damned theatrical make-up class...but man, i'm just looking for something to do that won't cost me too much money.

//more.good[byes]
jeez...last night was karen w's last night at work...and a couple nights before was stephani e's last night at indy...i don't think i can take too many more good-byes...

//drive.around
lately...i've just wanted to drive around...without a purpose...without a destination...i just want to drive around.

goodbye summer.

when you realize all that you've gained
will it be worth all you've lost?
and when you realize you're not the same
this sudden change came at what cost?
--yet another song i'm working on

//mood//smmmashing
//song//down : something.corporate

//[jimmy]crack.corn
i've decided that i don't care anymore. it'll be a little less drama...and i've got friends elsewhere. whoo!

//flirting.with[danger]
okay...so, last night at work, i saw a few cute girls throughout the duration of my evening.

i was at south load, and i was checking out this one girl, made eye contact...then her boyfriend made some angry eye-contact with me. send it.

yeahh...i was kinda like...oh, crap.

then, another time, i was at north load, and there was this one cute girl, a little shorter than me, and i was all like how are you doing? having fun?...we were having a nice little conversation with flirty eyes and stuff...i'm thinking aww yeahh...then she goes to sit down, and someone i'm guessing would be her boyfriend starts giving her a backrub...and i'm thinking aww sh_t...

anyways...last night was a funny night at work...

good times.