//mood//enriched
//note//no hidden messages in this entry...i'm saying everything i need to say out loud in this one...enjoy.

//purpose+clarity
i have a purpose in life. right now, i think my purpose is to positively influence others, as well as make others happy. becoming famous is not a purpose...and i used to think that it was...but, what kind of purpose is that when no one can benefit from it? what benefit does fame have in my life and those around me? no, i want my life to be a benefit to the world.

not because it's the good and right thing to do...because it's what i want to do. that purpose is what gives my life meaning, it is what motivates me to wake up everyday and be the person i am.

this is clarity for me.

God put us all here for a reason.

i just don't want to die without having a purposeful life...without making someone's life better...without making an impact in someone's life.

i think that's what frustrates me so much in life...when i disappoint other people. yes, i want to be liked by everybody...it's not just a selfish thing, i realize...i just want to know that i'm doing good in someone's life...anyone's life.

i'd like to know that my life was an example before it ends.

am i talking about death? yes. but it shouldn't be a taboo subject, because it's something we've all got to do eventually. death can come anyday now...nothing is guaranteed...i'm not even depressed and i'm talking about death. when i talk about death in this way, i'm celebrating life. i know i sound crazy and i know this doesn't make sense to a lot of you out there...

but, you all have a purpose in this world...there's a reason why you're here...whether or not you believe in a God...you're going to impact someone's life one way or another...and how much that means to you is up to you...

all i'm saying is that it means a lot to me...it means everything to me...because that's what my life is about.

that's purpose.

watching/reading tuesday's with morrie has really gotten me to thinking...it's not such a bad book like i thought it'd be. i know it's extremely cliche and everything...but, jeez...you've gotta have meaning in your life.

there just comes a point where you've got to ask yourself, what is important to you? and are you living for it?

i walked out of my english class today, and it was simply nice. plain and simple, it was nice. the sky was clear, there was a slight breeze, and the way the sun hit the back of my neck felt wonderous. the trees just looked greener than ever. i got caught up in the beauty of the day.

this whole thing of wanting/needing to be influential--yes, it makes me very dependent of others...when did dependacies become a bad thing? when? why is it so shameful to be dependent on others? to love is a very dependent action...one cannot love alone.

if the purpose of impact and influence is the outline for my life, then love is the colors that illustrate my life.

i am thinking more clearly than ever in my life, and it feels great.

to be extremely cliche...all there's left to do is love.