i realized something. if the world was a movie, then i'm just the friendly geek best friend who is completely hopeless, never gets the girl, but is still cool with everyone because he's the friend. i think i will always be the friendly geek. the sensitive, friendly geek. the one that you'd hang out with, and talk with like you've got a connection, but would never get with. yeah, that's me. i might as well face it now. i'm the unlucky character in the movies. the smart, clever, cute (in a geek way), sarcastic, supporting character, comic relief, best friend geek...never the boyfriend...never the dashing attractive hero...the friendly sidekick geek. the one who is always told: yeah, like a friend after he asks do you like me?

yeah, i'm likable...in the nerdy unattractive non-sexual way. the one that everyone is surprised to hear it when he's done something crazy. the one you go to for answers, the one you go to for comfort, the one you go to for a friend--never for sex, or a date...unless you're trying to make your ex jealous...or something like that.

yeah, i'm the disposable geek.